Wednesday, November 9, 2016

Discovering Innate Happiness

Happiness is not as transient as an imprint on a sand that a wave comes and wash it away. But it is an innate inscription that have been deeply coalesced with our soul...:)

Why do we celebrate festivals? Do we really celebrate it for the mythological reasons? I think this is only partially true. Festivals have way more deeper value than one can think. Festivals have different meaning for different people. They bring "some" close to home creating cohesiveness and for some they are the days when they miss "home" the most. They give opportunities to families to come together eliminating all the minor-major barriers,provide them hope for a better future. They give the busy workaholics an excuse to take a sabbatical,an excuse to the figure-conscious people to be on a cheat diet for a while. For some festivals are a source of earning livelihoods,for some they are the avenues of superfluous expenditure.
In all,they give people a reason to celebrate,to be happy or at least force themselves to be happy amid the jovial environment. What we are really after? We create an ambience, a stage where we keep all the things that will or can give us satisfaction and will make us at peace and happy.But the truth is even with all the props at the stage why don't we feel happy to the core? Why our happiness feels so transient? Ever thought of that? I do..everyday. The transient nature of our happiness is derived from the root cause that we have based our happiness purely over materialistic gratification. And we experience ripples of short-lived happy  moments now and often but still our soul craves for that long-lasting happiness,no where to be found in all that glitters! Being happy is the innate nature of a soul which have eroded via lust and materialism and thus we are left with little of it,so little that we have only a hunch that something's missing but never really find out,what it is.And we surround ourselves with all the happy ingredients and try to get those ripples if not the absolute happiness that our soul yearns for. We settle for the ripples when there is complete possibility of us regaining our true innate nature! We think those heavy words like absolute happiness is not for the ordinary people like us but it is for the godly incarnations such as Shakyamuni Buddha. We never realize regaining our true happy nature is as simple as restoring phone's factory settings to default, in case we haven't tampered with the default password(default passwords are 12345,read the manual :P).
You get it right? What I'm trying to say is that don't tamper with your innate tendencies. Don't get engulfed in the materialism. I'm not implying that you wear the saffron clothes and become a saint but all I'm saying is create a balance out of  both worlds by mixing the best of both worlds.Only then one can be happy despite the happy props!!

Sunday, October 23, 2016

The Introspection

          Morning deep thoughts and conversations with oneself....:)
My solitude-my best friend,my never ending desires-my worst foe. My failures are the cornerstones of my success. Intense thrust upon me squeezed out the best out of me,symphony of love emanating from an abnormally pulsating heart,only having one question in my mind “Will I get through?” Someday somehow I know I’ll come up to my expectations,grow and reach beyond the skies,up high. There’s a long journey ahead,a route to love,happiness and success waiting for my imprints!!!!!!!!
Well it is always great to talk to oneself. It kind of fuels the inner desire and passion of not giving up and keep moving on. I know we all have some moments of self-doubt when doing some tasks but it is necessary to resolve them as quickly as possible. Because there is no scope of going forward when you doubt your abilities. Doubting is like a redirecting link,a hyperlink that takes you in the past and when you go to past, you are living backwards and that's not an appropriate action. So,a word of caution- Introspect yourself,motivate yourself and keep moving forward.

Friday, October 21, 2016

The Shallow teapot

Some tea time pondering..........:-)

The Shallow teapot
A potter gave life to a tea pot and put it to forge,
But the pot was reluctant to bear all the heat n scorch.
With no other way the potter made it look beautiful from the outside,
This shallowness of the teapot, only vibrant colors and glaze could really hide.
It was kept for sale at a relatively low price and was very quickly bought,
The buyer mesmerized with the beauty outside didn’t even give a second thought.
He noticed the shallowness from the very start but didn’t mind a bit,
He already had a place in mind where the pot would fit.
Placed on the highest spot on display,the teapot brimmed only with pride,
It looked down on others and soon there was none on its side.
Unlike others, the teapot never ever got to fulfill its fate,
No tea was ever poured to it which filled it with hate.
One day it happened it tried to replace the one above the flame,
As soon as it touched the heat, it cracked and cried with pain.
Having realized his mistake the buyer encountered the potter,
The potter accused both buyer and teapot for this whole disaster.
“If one was shallow in sense of depth, the other was in sense of thoughts,
Miseries of the teapot started when it denied the pain that would have strengthened it,
The buyer on the other hand looked only for the outside beauty and ignored his own wit”.......

Saturday, October 15, 2016

Thursday, October 13, 2016


I was going through some posts in my face book timeline. I was surprised to see many had similar life conditions as mine. They were feeling the same, sharing the same and even commenting similar ideas. And suddenly I realised I wasn’t the only one in the world who was undergoing the same set of feelings. There were many souls connected to mine in ways quiet difficult for me to decipher but we did have a connection. For once in my life, I felt relaxed and comforted that I wasn’t the only one. See if it was a good thing I would have wanted it would have occurred to only me and me. But for bad ones, I felt kind of soothed that there were others too! And this realisation somehow put an ointment to my wounds and the lines I used to hear in Hindi echoed in my ears “Dukh baatne se ghat ta hai”. Then it struck me at once, was it God who was distributing my pain to the universe and lessening it somehow. And he was doing this for everybody. No wonder that is why the pain just goes away with time. In actual it isn’t time which heals it. We the people living in this universe just distribute it among ourselves without even being a tinge of conscious about this noble deed. We at the will of God, act as the healers of one another’s pain and sorrows. God and pain, both are omnipresent. And we people are the smallest unit of a “virtuous distribution cycle”. In addition, God has forbidden us to hold on to the pain for long and given us a way to lessen it out and heal ourselves by cycling it through this virtuous cycle.....

Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Turning Miseries into Inspiration

There is no life without miseries and problems. Many at times these miseries and problems, takes the shape of an Inspiration and thus become a source of success for many people. Artists look for inspiration, writers look for it. When I read romantic novels of Nicholas sparks, my heart is prepared to bear a death in the end and also I could easily get notion of a cancer patient. When reading Mitch Albom, I get a modern mix of spirituality. I see some beautiful heart touching movies that have a title running in their start as being based on real stories! These all things made to ponder that all the amazing creators may have undergone something excruciating or something miraculous which have lead them into creating something so extraordinary. May be Sparks lost someone he loved battling with cancer or Mitch Albom witnessed some godly miracles which he now tag under the genre fiction! It is true that these all are assumptions. But one thing is very clear to me, that every great achiever got a push somewhere in his life which moved him to do amazing things. And thus excellent writers, painters, artists and other people of high caliber underwent phases of transformation as a consequence of some miseries of their life.

The point is this inspirational push will eventually come to you. You cannot know when it is going to come but you’ll definitely know after it has transformed your life! You have no control over it to come early or leave early from your life. But what you can do for sure is that no matter with how much intensity this push tries to knock you over, you should never let go of the “pole of faith” you have been holding onto. No push can knock you over if you have strong determination and faith that you will pass through but if it waivers, you are susceptible to fail and lose yourself amid the havocs. Thus inspiration is the by product of faith and firm determination, brought together to stand still in the event of being pushed over. And this inspiration stays with you and evident in all the amazing things you do after you discover it.

Now can you answer, what inspires you? If you can answer think yourself as blessed and if not, don’t ever stop searching for it because there is no life without an inspirational push in it. And when it comes, you just need to mix the ingredients rightly and then you shall become the spot-lighted face of the endeavours that will inspire others to find their calling in life. Like ways the chain reaction is started where one who have found his calling because of those pushes, is present before the world to share and appreciate the power of the miseries he had faced in his life. It can lead to spreading the awareness to the people out in the world to stop grieving and start making fortune out of their miseries by taking them as inspiration and not as an event of self-destruction!

Tuesday, October 11, 2016

Going back to the Biological Clock

Long before the digital age, long before time tracking ‘Clocks” were invented; people did keep track of time. They relied on a natural god-gifted time keeper known as the biological clock. And I believe that this clock was way better way of keeping track of time as it taught the person to be self-disciplined. I believe that the answer to each of our problem generally comes from within. It is often said that an individual soul is self-sufficient in every way and why won’t it be, God has created us that way. And it is a true notion indeed. So, he must have provided us with a clock within, right! It is nowhere near to a mechanical one with two-three needles and fancy decorations but it is so much powerful and accurate than any of them put together.
A lot many of us struggle each day to crawl out of bed, snoozing alarm infinite times till we are confronted with guilt of sleeping for so long and beginning a day with guilt is never a right way to start your morning. Mornings are supposed to be full of energy, a day booster so that you can feel fresh and carry your work schedule. There is a way to deal with it without the need of any external medium. You just have to rely on yourself for that. There is a unique way in which you can reset your biological clock whenever you want. By consistency of thoughts, this is possible. I will give you a small example as a proof of my words (You can find similar example in a book “Power of your subconscious”). Each day when you go to bed repeat to yourself at least fifty times in mind at what time you want to rise up in the morning. Think of it as an input for your mind. The human mind does not work only on power but to execute tasks it relies on a “Belief system”. Your mind can never perform a task if you don’t believe you are capable of doing it. Repeating ensures that you establish belief on what you are saying. For ex- You need to be up at 7:00 am. The next day you will be up on the exact time without even putting alarms. No snoozing, no irritation just awaking on your own and still feeling fresh and with no desire to crawl back to the bed. And believe me It will never fail when you perform it with conviction. Thus, you can re – engineer your mind by inputting the right kind of “thoughts” and get amazing results.

Monday, October 10, 2016

Beast Remains “Untamed”

Whenever a history book is opened, the first chapter anyone generally comes through is about the civilizations. Amidst all these civilizations, one question always catches my due attention. Which was the first animal tamed by man? The history book answers this question saying that it is dog. I think the first animal tamed by man is the man himself. From being a wild, savage beast he slowly transcended himself into a disguise of a civilized bei­ng. Nomad man didn’t give up his wildness but instead he concealed all his savagery inside layers of masks known as personality. He became an actor, who acts differently with different people, but beneath all those layers, the savage beast still exists. And from time to time that beast tries his way out. Nowadays we see news about ill happenings around the world. Rape, harassment and murders have become a daily affair. Ever tried to figure out why people have lost their saneness and engaging in such shameless activities? The past of man is haunting him and even though he has worked on himself for many centuries that wild instinct still prevails inside him.
The picture of man as we see today has degraded more than any other animal. Because of his deeds, he has become the wildest of all the animals. As we see in the supernatural movies the devil is locked and forbidden to come out by putting a spell by the holy people, the same way the beast inside him was wrapped under the spell of moral values and ethical behavior. But loss of these values has broken the spell and man has retreated back to what he was in the past. Man has spent thousands of years undergoing evolution, from being a food gatherer to a food producer. But did he really evolve? He just started hiding his true self and lived a life of lies and faking things. They say history repeats itself. And I guess it’s absolutely true in this case too. Man is now experiencing process of reverse evolution where he is going back to where he started­­­­­­!

Thursday, October 6, 2016

Unleash the Protagonist Within You

At this age also I’m a die-hard fan of animated cartoon movies. I don’t feel shy to say it out loud. These movies are so full of positive vibes, so beautifully visioned and hold a very beautiful moral for the viewers. When I finished watching “Wreck It Ralph”, it did make me think that what if throughout your whole life you were told that you were a “glitch” and somebody else was living the life that was made for you. Isn’t the mere thought, scares the hell out of you! It scared me too .Believe me not all of us comes to this realization and spends our whole life serving under and not fulfilling the true life purpose ever. But inside few heads, the thought always hover that they were the protagonists. And like in the movie the girl who believed that she wasn’t a glitch but a very valuable part of the game ends up discovering that she was indeed the princess of the whole game! The place which was taken up deceivingly by another game’s character.

All my life, I believed I was a low profile actor who was introduced in the story to be a helping hand, a crying shoulder and a secret diary to the so-called protagonist. But in my head I always knew I wasn’t the one what I settled for. I was so much more. This realization came when I met some extraordinary fellow lives who saw it in me right from the start. And with time this realization grew stronger and I was no longer accepting to be a glitch but claim my stake to what belonged to me. With my belief and determination, one day I was able to out throw the one who didn’t belong to my story. I became the protagonist of my story for real and not just in my head. And it felt so good because I could now steer my life to the places which mattered to me and enjoy the freedom of choosing and not accepting what was being offered. The thing is don’t ever think you are a glitch or some low–profile actor. You are protagonist and your story belongs to you. Always listen to your heart, it will move you to achieve your highest potentials and do the amazing things!

Tuesday, October 4, 2016

The Angel's Letter

I was standing six feet away from the edge of a deep trench. I had a piece of paper in my hand. It wasn’t blank; it had something written on it. The writing was not mine but it was a familiar one. I saw few numbers scribbled on the paper “4:44”.  The dream continued in the Eastman colours and suddenly she appeared! She was standing few inches away from me. She was my ex-girlfriend “Riddhi”! I was chasing her throughout the dream but she was just running away. I asked her to stop and answer the pool of questions I have been keeping in my head since we broke up four years back. But she ignored all of it; she wasn’t willing to answer. Suddenly, the beautiful scene turned scary when I bumped onto a stone and was about to fall in a pit full of weird stuff! I woke up, gasping for air and with sweat on my forehead. I sipped few gulps of water and stared at the clock. I saw the numbers on my digital clock as 4:44. I have been seeing this number for the third time in the last three days in dream as well as for real. Out of curiosity I ran it through google and the results I found astonished me. It is called as “Angel number”. It indicated as an awakening, a transformation in one’s life. I wondered what it could be. Anyways, I felt relaxed on realising it was just a dream. There was hardly any time left when my alarm was about to ring. So I decided to come out of the bed. A week long journey was waiting for me, meeting old friends. I was mostly thrilled about this meet as she would also surely be there and finally I would get the closure if not the answers I wanted for all that happened between us.
It was still dark when I stepped out of the cab and walked towards the entry gate of the Delhi airport. The early morning air of February was pleasantly cold.
I was travelling to Bengaluru to attend a college friend's wedding. It had been four years since we graduated from the same college. This wedding was also going to be a reunion of our batch mates. But what I didn't know was that the reunion would begin much ahead of time; right in the queue in front of the airline counter. I was almost sure it was her. Same height! Same long hair! Same dressing style! Curiosity had my eyes glued to her. And then about 60-odd seconds later, when she turned back, she proved me right. My ex-girlfriend stood ten places ahead of me in that queue. We had never met after the college farewell.(The italic lines are lines from an author in TOI write India contest)
“Oh my god”, that was my first reaction. Though I had prepared a whole paragraph to say to her in case we met in the future but on sighting her for real, my memory became hazy. I tried to camouflage so that she doesn’t see me. Just when I thought I’m over her. There she stood in front of me. I had no idea whether I should just pop in front of her with a casual “Hi” or should wait for her to start. My ego wasn’t letting me to start first and why would I?  She was the one who dumped me and broke my heart. Getting over her cost me endless sleepless nights, alcoholism and then finally a rebound affair. And to add to my miseries, an announcement was made. Bengaluru flights have been delayed by 6 hours due to heavy fog. Now situation was worse. And with the announcement been made I got an idea that sooner or later we are going to bump against each other. I wanted things to be natural so for a while I halted this chain of thoughts and concentrated on the novel I had brought with myself. Then after half an hour, I heard a voice “Sameer”. I looked up she was standing in front me. I tried looking surprised but she was the one who was wearing that sweet surprised smile of hers and I was the one with odd confused-looking one. I checked for “the ring” on her finger. And to my relief there was none. I was a bit relaxed.  If anyone was to get married first between us it would be me. I told her that I was also going to the wedding. And then we went to the coffee house to sip some coffee.  I had no idea how to talk to her as we hadn’t talk after our breakup. Then I asked something weird. “Are u single?”She was like “What?...Are you hitting on me?”I nodded in defiance.  
“Ya I’m single. But don’t be flattered. I have been with two guys after we broke up”,she bragged.
“Oh really..I had also had like 3 girlfriends”, I exaggerated.
“Can we just keep past as past and move on. I don’t want to ruin the fun at the wedding so can we try having peace”. She suggested. 
Our flight had been rescheduled after 6 hours till then we had nothing to do.
I always had two questions to ask her. “Where did it go wrong? Why did she dump me?” But this wasn’t the right time to ask as she already made it very clear that we don’t talk about the past issues and spoil the fun. We were glued to the cafe chairs for an hour now, had finished two king-size cappuccinos. Her phone rang and for like next twenty-five minutes and  she was talking, giggling. May be it was her boyfriend on the other side. Why did I care! And I also got indulged pretending as if I was texting. I could still feel some spark between us in spite of being away from each other for so long. A part of me still longed for her. But there was no way we could fit together as with time we both have surely outgrown each other. She was my high school sweetheart. How could I forget how I felt our relationship survived and sustained even the steepest of ups and downs in the college era?  But I could never understand why on earth she dumped me and that too on the farewell day. I don’t know why she chose that day! I worked out various theories and concluded so that she could bid me goodbye for now and forever. She has always been bossy. Always bossing me around, just announcing what she wanted to say and seldom heard me out. I somewhere knew that this will not work but still I put myself through that situation in a hope that things might work out, but that didn’t happen.
Then my phone rang for real and led me out of this chain of thoughts. It was my mother. I didn’t want my mother to hear her voice, so kept the phone close to my face covering with my hand. Riddhi was always a curious mouse and my act somehow caught her attention and now her eyes rested on me. Then she spoke “I thought you will never get over me.”Then there was a lot of flirting from her side as if she didn’t want me to move on. And as I had also some feelings cornered for her, I reciprocated. And that long time just flew by and we heard the announcement about our rescheduled flight. We both were too tired and dozed off as soon as we sat down in our seats and when woke up we had already reached our destination.
 We both shared a taxi and reached our friend’s home. All of our friends were already there and anxiously waiting for us and not to mention, quiet shocked to see both of us arriviing together. For a while they got a notion that we were back together. Although I liked the idea but I cleared it soon enough and explained what happened. Then throughout the wedding ceremonies I tried to reinstate our relationship as being with her in such a romantic ambience brought out the old feelings, I once claimed were grounded for good. I tried to an extent that to refresh the old memories in a pre wedding photo shoot I wore the same outfit that I wore on my farewell’s day. I was surprised to know that it was still a snug fit.  But she hardly noticed me and was flirting to one of our batch mate’s cousin. She didn’t see me coming. I was disappointed and to be precise “jealous”. I remained absent throughout the ceremony, put some cigarettes in my pocket and went to a solitary place to smoke it out. When I reached for the cigarettes, I also found a piece of paper. I could not recollect putting it there today and this was the first time I wore it after the break up day. It suddenly strikes me; it would have been there since the day Riddhi broke up with me. I opened it quickly and on seeing it I remembered my earlier dream. It was Riddhi’s writing.  
When I finished reading it, I was numb for full ten minutes.  I was suddenly standing in my farewell. Brain wise, I was the smartest guy in my batch so I was supposed to get the best package in the campus interviews. But luck didn’t favour and so did few other situations and I settled for the lowest package. I was disappointed but for me something was better than nothing. Riddhi didn’t even sit for interviews and as I recall, earlier she told me she wanted to pursue further studies and didn’t want to get tempted if she gets a good package. But after reading the letter I got to know the reason she broke up with me was that she expected I would get highest paying package and she now don’t see the future with me. And she wanted to settle as soon as we finished college. She didn’t want to waste her life working but loiter and have fun.
This letter opened my eyes. Had I discovered it four years back, I would have thought of leaving the package I got and without a job tried endlessly for a job that would suit her desires. I would have convinced her to reconcile and give it a second thought, cried and even pleaded without a tinge of self-esteem. She on the other hand would have made fortune out of my earnings! Although I didn’t get much at my first job but I learned a lot and had less workload which gave me enough time for the things in my bucket list! It all made sense to me now. Getting this four years later when I was a strong full grown tree and not a tiny fragile sapling was indeed god’s plan of keeping me away from a “materialistically selfish” companionship.
I could now see more clearly than I ever could. I rushed back to the wedding premises. She noticed me coming. She tried putting her hand on mine. I pulled back immediately. I told her it was good that I met her here. I got the closure I always wanted. To my surprise I also got the answers. They were aging in my suit’s pocket for four years now. Just as wine, aging of this letter made the letter clearer, more sensible and safer for me to take a gulp and not throw up. I told her I always loved the idea of her and not the person she actually was. My words didn’t bother her much and she went back to the one she was flirting earlier. But it all changed for me and with the letter in my hand I marched away from her, just like a soldier who returns victorious from the battlefield!

Monday, October 3, 2016

To a “differently loved” sibling

She was always the high note in the music of our family from the very start,
 A spoiled brat, never listening, ever complaining but a person of good heart.
Soon enough it happened, the seeds of hatred sown long ago,
Received the food of false perceptions and began to grow.
The day arrived when the seed grew into an enormous tree with diverse branches,
It bumped its roots deep inside her heart and started the yield of poisonous fruits.
It harmed not only her but the family as a whole,
Nearly impossible to uproot this one deep rooted in her soul.
Even if one tries, it would take away a part of her,
And I never wanted to do things that leave a scar on her.
With no plausible way to be seen, I folded my hands and prayed.
I asked for a divine intervention for transforming her heart and so he did.
It wasn’t only one heart that transformed that day,
God changed her heart and mine too!
When I realised the transformation, I wasn’t surprised as you,
I knew creating such a huge chaos wasn’t one- man task but comprised of “two”.
God was pleased with my response and asked me my one wish,
I again folded my hands and prayed, whenever similar circumstances shall prevail in life of others,
May they realise that mistakes are not always one-sided especially when it comes to  family!

Sunday, October 2, 2016


I know some of the things I’m writing might offend “the liars” but isn’t it true that truth indeed is offending. Truth is not usually liked or preferred; it disappoints and makes you restless. Truth is a bitter medicine but lie on the other hand is a sweet poison. But isn’t it a good news? Medicine, no matter how bitter heals your body but poison on the other hand kills you. So which is better, being alive or dead? You all know what the answer is. Then why you have to run away from truth, let’s just face it. And as I always believe that I am willing to be hurt by a truth than to be relieved by a swarm of lies.

It really cut you open when you find out that the person whom you trust the most gave you “lies” in disguise of “truths”. And the funny thing you believed all of it, ignoring the voices in your head. I must tell you that I supposed myself to be a wise man. But soon I realized that there may and will come a time when a wise man builds his home upon a sand! Imagine what repercussions shall come to the home once the harsh winds come along with the grey skies and takes away with it “The Home”. You are left with nothing but with mourning and repenting over your foolishness. You only wish if only you were told the bitter truth a long before, it could have saved your valuable time and most importantly saved your soul. Whatsoever, I assumed myself “Wise” for quite a few reasons and committing such a mistake did break me but it just did not break me enough to give up my life and my beliefs. That is one of the reasons I categorized myself wise. Not falling for the trap of lies again in my life was another reason.

Thus, I strive to become a truth-monger in this era of harsh liars. There is only handful of them and the balancing act totally relies on their shoulders. I hope to become a truth monger soon enough. As I know now what it feels to be the one on whose ears those words of lie drops. It may not always do instant harm but it will do that in the long run. Let the truth prevail and as they say “Truth alone triumphs”. So I shall be triumphant soon enough!

Dare and Meet the Destiny

For once I remember I was told that new ideas are like the new born babies. When an idea takes birth, it is filled with fear because it does not recognize the new place where it has descended after the comfort of the womb. The new idea is surrounded by clouds of doubts and criticism and often kept a wary eye on. In such conditions the generator of the idea has the sole responsibility to nurture it, to groom it so well that it is potent enough to penetrate through the darkness and see the light as soon as possible. In such journey, the idea may fall several times and even have to crawl on its way out as it is still in the beta phase. But, the more encouragement and nurtured it is, the sooner it reaches its destination. And believe me nothing is more beautiful than witnessing your own idea to reach the light. It is the moment when a discovery, an invention is made.
Now it makes more sense that why not all ideas are a success and vice-versa. As it is an old saying “success belongs only to those, who dare”. Several ideas die a natural death and some are forced to death as once they fall, they do not dare to crawl and bruise their knees enough to be able to get on their feet again. Only those who gather the courage to rise up again and again even after all the mocking and criticism offered by the world reaches their true destiny and the rest “rest” in peace.

Friday, September 30, 2016

The Lesson

You would be well aware of the cactus plant. We all have seen it grow somewhere near our house. It was this specific plant that made me who I’m today. I’m a curator with an utmost love for nature and art. You could call me a person who is fond of plants and gardens, but it was only recent advancements that made me the person who would not mind getting his hands dirty and sweating through the day, in order to bring into life the tiny little seeds and shoots each day. And I won’t hitch a little to admit that I enjoyed my work. But I wouldn’t have find my jinx if this one small yet significant incident hadn’t occurred in my life.

When I was a kid, we had a little cactus plant which was planted in a very decorative vase, kept on the roof. We had a little home garden in our roof thatch and that place was my refuge. I would spend hours admiring the cactus as it stood different from the rest. That’s the first thing which lured me towards it. And believe me it was just a start. Slowly steadily, the fondness grew a lot more. I would talk to that plant for hours, water it. Although I knew that these plant need minimum water to survive. They have evolved themselves this way, but my fondness almost blinded me. I wanted this plant to be the best. I wanted this plant to bloom beautiful leaves and flowers. So I nurtured it as if it was my child. I was confident in my venture and believed that the thorns of the plant can never prick me or cause me pain as I was loving it with all my heart and giving it all it ever wanted.

The day reached when the clouds of my misunderstandings were now about to precipitate. It was time for me to know the truth. I happened to somehow lose my balance and about to fall down the stairs and that’s when I reached to get hold of something to prevent the fall. And guess what I reached for. Yes! “The cactus”. Though I didn’t fall but I was terribly bruised and bleeding through my right arm because of the cactus pricks. And that was an eye opener for a kid like me. Like it just pricked the bubble I was living into until now. The cactus was never in need of “water” I offered it- day and night. I wanted the cactus to bloom! That was my first mistake. Cactus is not meant for that. They are meant for many things, but not that.

For so many years I paid no attention to any other plant whatsoever. Full of resentment and feeling betrayed, I looked up to the sky and yelled to the big man above. I yelled and yelled, asked for answers that if my love have gone into waste; What good did all these years brought me; I wasted my precious time and attention for a reason and for the plant that were by all means never to be gratified. Then what I discovered at that moment is a lesson I treasure to this day in my life. I saw a big outlet outside the vase. All the water I was brimming up into the cactus, was actually also going out to the bed my mother had made for new exotic flower seeds. She got it from our neighbour who claimed that it was nearly impossible to get these little devils pop out of the soil of our country and my mother decided to take the challenge and seeing me so fascinated with the roof garden, gave me the task of watering those exotics.But as I said, it was only cactus which was worth to me, so I never actually pour my love to those exotics. Despite this, when  I went closer to the quarry and to my surprise; there were saplings all around the soil. I jumped with both enjoyment and enchantment. I couldn’t believe it was me who was responsible for bringing these plants to life. It is one in a million feeling when you see the plants you grow, come to life. That was the moment I cherish till today and if it wasn’t for the cactus, I would have never realized that “Who are those, who are worth my time”. I almost forgot the pain from all the bruises. Indeed some lessons in life are learnt with pain and better they arrive early in life so that you can recover speedily and live rest of your days remembering the experiences and not the pain!

Metamorphosis in Relationships

She willed herself to not check her phone to see if he had replied. It had been about three days now. She hated that she was constantly checking his 'last seen at' status and yes, he had logged in just five minutes ago. Yet she couldn't stop herself. This sinking feeling to find absolutely no communication from him was becoming unbearable, almost torturous. And then, just as she sat down in her chair, her phone vibrated. With her heart thudding in her ear, she unlocked her phone and stared at the screen. Finally! It was his message. But when she opened it and read it, she nearly stopped breathing. She didn't know if he was joking or not. What was this? (these highlighted lines are by an author, given in write india contest TOI)

“Hi! can we be friends again?” This message nearly gave a hard blow to the last seven years Priya had spent with Nikhil. “What’s happening?” she thought to herself. “Is he joking or what?” “Friends?” “What about those seven years?” “Were we enemies then,” she murmured to the point that a squeak came out from her throat, though unintentionally.

Three months have passed since they got transferred in different cities and haven’t talked after having that moment with each other where the line between love and friendship became blurry. Nikhil was avoiding every kind of communication that can happen between them. But, Priya needed answers. She wanted Nikhil to put an end to her misery and tell her what exactly he wants from her. Priya couldn’t handle the pain anymore. She wanted to return to the past were Nikhil and Priya were best of friends. Things seemed to be much easier then. But ever since Nikhil staked their friendship and took a step forward their relationship took a new turn. Now he was confused. So he began to avoid her.

His every thought was being diverted towards all kinds of “what- ifs”. “What if this was a bad idea?” “What If I screw up and lose her forever?” Nikhil kept repeating this chain of thoughts every now and then. He admitted that things cannot be same as before as his heart had changed. Of course, he needed time to think about it. But Priya’s growing anxiousness forced him to cut her off for a while.

Nikhil was also in distress. He tried writing his feelings to her in a SMS but he couldn’t just press the enter button and instead he wrote something silly and sent her. He banged his head hard; pulled his hair; called himself an idiot and slammed the phone as hard he could. The phone landed on a towel lying on the floor few inches away from him.

He looked at the phone and yelled “Lucky for you as I didn’t care enough to clean this mess.” He looked around and saw the mess he had made. He had not cleaned the room in months as he kept obsessing over Priya. And he started arranging his room. His mind was still hovering over Priya. He coughed all along while dusting his book shelf. His eyes caught a sight of an autograph book which he had maintained during his college days. He started turning the pages. His eyes were searching for a particular name. He then remembered where Priya could possibly give her autograph. He turned to the last pages and there was it. He read through the whole five pages she wrote about her life, likes and dislikes; dreams; friends; thoughts. There was not a word in those pages that was unknown to him. He knew everything about her. This realization came as a surprise for him too. He never thought he would have known someone so closely in his life. With this realization now he could make up his mind and know what he really wants. He wanted to be with Priya for now and forever.

“Cleaning room was not such a bad idea,” he said to himself. He had understood that all the mess was solely in his head and his own creation. Once he decided to clean it, he could finally find real answers. The answers were lying there with him in his room already; he just needed to find it. All his doubts seemed to be conquered by the arrows of belief. The same “belief” that Priya holds in him. He felt so low and guilty for ignoring her for all these months.

He planned a trip to her place on the coming weekend so that he could make up for the restless, anxious days and nights he had given to her. The only problem was that he didn’t have the current address of her. He called their common friends one by one. Some didn’t respond due to office hours, some were too angry at him as they know tits and tats of the whole episode. Fortunately, one of our school friend who was in same city as hers reciprocated positively to his call and helped him in locating her residence in Delhi. It only takes 6-7 hours from Dehradun to reach Delhi. Nikhil chose to drive there by himself.

He wore his best clothes; sprayed cologne liked by Priya; bought a box of ferrero rocher and hurried to his car. It was Friday night and he wanted to be there with her before she wakes up on the Saturday morning. He reached Delhi an hour ago because of light traffic but it took him few hours to locate her house. Gladly, the boon of google maps saved his time and he was standing at her door by 7 am. He stood before her door for a while. He repeated the whole speech which he had been preparing on his way. His heart was pounding yet he somehow gathered the courage to ring the doorbell.

After ringing the bell thrice, he heard footsteps approaching near. Now he was sweating in a winter morning. She opened the door, yawning and on seeing Nikhil, her jaws dropped with surprise and she kept rubbing her eyes as if she thought she was dreaming. She was having mixed reactions. For one second she was so elated that she was laughing and for another second, she was giving him angry bird looks. He stood by the door silently, watching her reaction and then she invited him in. He said nothing but hugged her for around ten mississippi. Tears rolled down their face. Of course, these were the tears of joy. He told him about his realization and they talked for hours until their stomachs were growling. She cooked him his favourite meal and they had their brunch together. He asked her if she had forgiven him. She said nothing but smiled in the most innocent way ever. He understood Priya’s gesture and why he wouldn’t. He was her best friend who had undergone metamorphosis and turned into the love of her life!

Thursday, September 29, 2016


2015 was the worst year of my life. But it did teach me life's great lessons in disguise as well as some quiet out open. I was living an aimless life, like most of us do today. We are living either an aimless life or a life with aim which is not ours but of our partner! I'm a person of huge potentials and have many interests and hobbies. But did I do anything to make them grow? No! I sat down waiting for the right time, which believe me was never going to come with that attitude. When life was delivering its best of lessons in the class, I was the back-bencher who was playing with chalk pieces and busy in carving my teacher's mimic on the desk. Sometimes I was looking out of the window as the view enticed me more than the lessons. I had no clue what I was missing until that fateful day. I missed the lesson on TRUST. Yeah you heard me right. Only when I got mine broken, I came to know what all I missed. Only when I lost something very dear to me, then I realize how wrong my methods of aimlessly steering the caravan of my life were! I kept bumping into stones, even deep pits and wasted precious time going in a direction which was a dead end. And believe me I could see the “Dead End” from miles away yet I was faking to be myopic and driving towards it.

What was I thinking! That miraculously a hardy road will appear there, out of the blue. Oh how I wish that to be true. I guess I engrossed myself a way too much in fairy tales, believed a bit too much on the fairy god mothers! If only I was a Cinderella. I could have fairy god mother or a prince looking for me with a shoe in his hand. But neither was I a Cinderella nor was some prince looking for me. I was an ordinary person who was hoping that miracles can happen. But then life happens. And when I was hanging by a thread on the edge of the dead end, my whole life flashed before me. The familiar voices, the familiar faces and then suddenly face of my father came into forefront and he shouted “Jump now”. And I jumped. From a distance while I was falling, I saw the caravan burst into flames. Although my version of miracle differed from this one, yet it was a miracle after all. And due the aftershock I went into unconsciousness, only to find myself lying on the shore, soaked in water. I thought for a second if I was dead. And why would I not think that? I could see my dead father resting in an arm chair few meters away from me. He was waiting for me to gain consciousness. I rubbed my eyes as hard as I could. I couldn’t believe my eyes. Then, he spoke. “Feeling good?” And then I could not believe my ears! He reached for my forehead, to check for my temperature and then I lost trust in the sense of touch too. I managed to utter something, a little less rude. “Am I dead, papa?” ....To be continued